Subtext Reparations (inkling of a new joke)

Some people say “oh you Negroes! Constantly harping on the fact that your people started out in this country as slaves and then were freed but were still unequal and how because of that today there’s a huge psychological scar that effects how you are a black man or woman in America! Get over it!” Those people I usually call Boss because they’re usually in positions of power.

I’ve devised a way to counteract the fact that reparations will never happen. I call it subtextual reparations. Every 40th white person I meet (40 for 40 acres and a mule) I go out of my way to make their lives around me a living hell. Anytime they’re around me its like they’re in the movie Grounhog Day always repeating their worst 3rd grade experience (depantsing every day followed by self urination). Here’s the extra kick, I’m ridiculously nice to everyone else around them. The closer a friend of theirs is to them, the nicer I am to that friend. That way they never have anyone to turn to.

THE MARK: Man, that Baron is a BITCH!! He is such an asshole, right guys?

FRIEND #1: Uh, actually I think he’s great. He helped me out with my July rent.

FRIEND #2: Yeah, he sang at my Mom’s funeral the most beautiful acoustic version of “More than a Feeling” that I’ve ever heard.

FRIEND #3: He gave me some bone marrow.

HAHA, NO ONE TO TURN TO!! And when they are frustrated, all alone, ripping out their hair confused as to why I treat that way, I will smile and speak softly to myself the word “Reparations.”

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