I was just at my local bagel shop…

(Hi, I’m the section of this entry that will express ironic disbelief at the things Baron does so as to examine a cultural sterotype. So with that said….ahem….What!? Black guy eating bagels!? Next thing you know a Vietnamese guy will be talking about his love of knishes!)

…and I realized that when I’m at a place that has a tip jar, I will go out of my way to make sure someone sees me put money in the tip jar thus ensuring a pleasant interaction the next time I walk into that establishment.

(What?! A Black leaving tips!?)

I’ll stand there and clear my throat like an emphysemic choking on a piece of chicken…

(Chicken! I knew it they loved that stuff!)

…and once I have someone’s attention I raise my hand into the air and make a dramatic arm drop placing my money in the tip jar.

(Uh…um…jar! JAR!? Like a jar band! Which they have in the south! You know what else they have in the south? BLACK PEOPLE!)

Sometimes I’ll have a little turrets while doing it, “Thank you TIP for the wonderful TIP service. TIP see TIP ya TIP later.”

(I got nothing.)